Funny Jokes

Enjoy our team's carefully selected funny jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!

What’s Christ’s favorite cheesy cracker?

Jeez-Its.

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The lice in your head are starting to concern over deforestation.

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A first-grade teacher can’t believe her student isn’t hepped up about the Super Bowl.

“It’s a huge event. Why aren’t you excited?”

“Because I’m not a football fan. My parents love basketball, so I do too,” says the student.

“Well, that’s a lousy reason,” says the teacher. “What if your parents were morons? What would you be then?”

“Then I’d be a football fan.”

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A newcomer observes the inmates telling political jokes.

All the jokes are by now so deeply familiar that they simply refer to them by number.

“Forty-three,” says one. General hilarity.

“Two hundred and three”, says a second. Appreciative chuckles.

“Three hundred and twenty-nine,” says a third.

The newcomer decides to try his hand.

“Ninety-one”, he ventures. Total silence.

He tries again, “Three hundred and one.” Not a titter.

“Forty-two.” A deadly hush.

Puzzled, he asks his neighbor what he did wrong.

“Nothing,” he says. “It’s just the way you tell them.”

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What did the sign on the baker’s door read when she wanted to be alone?

Donut disturb.

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Are you made of ice cream?

Because I can’t wait to eat you up!

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It has been said about tax:

“For doing wrong, you are taxed a fine.

For doing well, you are fined a tax.”

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Walking down the road last night, I passed an apple pie, an ice cream sundae and a lemon cheesecake.

I thought, “The streets are strangely desserted tonight.”

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What do you call a woman with a frog on her head?

Lilly.

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Why did Batman break up with Catwoman?

He didn’t like getting hairballs.

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