Jokes Birthday: Funny and Hilarious!



Enjoy our team's carefully selected Birthday Jokes . Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!



Birthday Jokes


Youโ€™re gourdgeous!

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


Hot dog, itโ€™s your birthday!

Letโ€™s be Frank, youโ€™re probably planning to party your buns off, so go ahead โ€“ donโ€™t be a weenie!

Relish every moment of your celebration!

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


What to give a man whoโ€™s got everything?

A woman. Sheโ€™ll tell him how everything works.

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


Why did the teen get a grooming kit for his birthday?

It was his shaventeenth birthday.

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


On his 16th birthday, I thought my son deserved to know the truth about his being adopted.

So when he got home from school, I said to him, โ€œSteve, do you mind sitting down, Iโ€™ve got something to tell you.โ€

โ€œDad, guess what?!โ€ he shouted excitedly.

โ€œSteve, this is important.โ€ I urged.

โ€œNo way, Dad. Listen!โ€

โ€œSteve. Please. Donโ€™t make this hard for me. Itโ€™s about your mum and me.โ€

โ€œDad! Shut up! Iโ€™ve just won ยฃ250,000 on a scratch card!โ€

โ€œThatโ€™s amazing son! Your old Dadโ€™s really made up for you!โ€

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


Itโ€™s your birthday; letโ€™s donuts!

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


Yo mama so old, her birth certificate says, โ€œExpiredโ€.

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


Yo mama so ugly, the government decided to move Halloween to her birthday.

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


Yo mama so fat, every time she turns around itโ€™s her birthday.

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


What is a monsterโ€™s favorite part of a birthday celebration?

I scream.

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


What did the ice cream say to the grumpy birthday cake?

Whatโ€™s eating you?

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


Hey shorty, itโ€™s sherbet day!

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


How do you wish an ice cream a happy birthday?

โ€œHope your birthday is gelato fun!โ€

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


How do you wish a mushroom a happy birthday?

Happy birthday to a real fungi!

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


Why does the mushroom always get invited to birthday parties?

Heโ€™s a fun-gi.

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


Not to be Mushy but since it is your birthday I just want to say: I think you are the most Fungiing awesome mom, you are cute as a Button, you put in the fun in Fungus, you have always been there for Morel support, and you are like a Truffleโ€”hard to find and incredibly valuable.

You are the Champion of Moms! I mean I turned out alright, not to toot my own Trumpet.

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


Man tries to open a bank account.

Teller asks him, โ€œYour name?โ€

โ€œJ-j-jj-hhh-on S-ss-mm-i-tthh.โ€

โ€œOh, you stutter?โ€

โ€œNo, my dad did, but the person, who did by birth certificate, was a complete moron!โ€

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


Whatโ€™s the best way to get your husband to remember your anniversary?

Get married on his birthday!

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


The housewife answered a knock on the door and found a total stranger standing on the doorstep.

โ€œExcuse me for disturbing you, maโ€™am,โ€ he said politely, โ€œbut I pass your house every morning on my way to work, and Iโ€™ve noticed that every day you appear to be hitting your son on the head with a loaf of bread.โ€

โ€œThatโ€™s right.โ€

โ€œEvery day you hit him on the head with a loaf of bread, and yet this morning you were beating him with a chocolate cake.โ€

โ€œWell, today is his birthday.โ€

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


A man asked his wife, โ€œWhat would you most like for your birthday?โ€

She said, โ€œIโ€™d love to be ten again.โ€

On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early and they went to a theme park.

He put her on every ride in the par: the Death Slide, The Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear. She had a go on every ride there was.

She staggered out of the theme park five hours later, her head reeling and her stomach turning.

Then they were off to a movie theater where they ate popcorn and sweets and drank Cola.

At last, she staggered home with her husband and collapsed into bed.

Her husband leaned over and asked, โ€œWell, dear, what was it like being ten again?โ€ One eye opened and she groaned, โ€œActually, honey, I meant dress size!โ€

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


Statistics show that those who have the most birthdays live the longest!

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


When I was born I was so surprised I didnโ€™t talk for a year and a half.

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


Why do golfers prefer a birthday donut over a birthday cake?

Because there is a hole in one.

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


I used to be a boy trapped in a womanโ€™s body. But after 9 long months, I was finally born!

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


Forget about the past, you canโ€™t change it.

Forget about the future, you canโ€™t predict it.

Forget about the present, I didnโ€™t get you one.

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


Why do some people get heartburn every time they eat a birthday cake?

They always forget to take off the candles.

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„




















© 2022-2023 jokes.best