Best Jokes (4)



Knock! Knock!

β€œWho’s there?”

β€œBanana.”

β€œBanana, who?”

Knock! Knock!

β€œWho’s there?”

β€œBanana.”

β€œBanana, who?”

Knock! Knock!

β€œWho’s there?”

β€œOrange.”

β€œOrange, who?”

β€œOrange you glad I didn’t say banana!”

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Why do zombies speak Latin?

Because it’s a dead language.

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What happened after the mom purchased a loaf of bread from Albertsons?

By the time she got home, it was toast!

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Your breath stinks!

Get up and brush your teeth!

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You have 30 chocolate bars. You eat 20 in 1 day. What do you have now?

Diabetes.

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What do you get from an Alaskan cow?

Ice cream.

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A friend of mine accidentally deleted my game data and told me to calm down.

So, after a nice cup of tea, I hid his body.

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What language do Brazilian geese speak?

Portu-geese.

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It’s so hot the catfish are already fried when you catch them.

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A guy runs into a bar, and yells, β€œQuick! How tall is a penguin?”

The bartender says, β€œThree feet tall.”

The guy says, β€œOh my God! I just ran over a nun!”

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Why are baby flamingos so badly behaved?

Because the parents never put their foot down.

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Shouldn’t you be minding your business and looking out for low flying objects?

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When I was a kid, I told everyone that when I grew up, I wanted to be a stand-up comedian. They all laughed.

Well, I got a job doing stand-up in a comedy club and no one’s laughing now.

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What is the most common illness in China?

Kung Flu.

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A famous Australian fashion designer created a special collection of denim trousers for the indigenous population.

He calls them β€œaborijeans”.

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Coronavirus is all Gen Z’s fault.

They wanted everything to go viral, now look what’s happened.

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A distraught senior citizen phoned her doctor’s office.

β€œIs it true,” she wanted to know, β€œthat the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life?”

β€œYes, I’m afraid so,” the doctor told her.

There was a moment of silence before the senior lady replied, β€œI’m wondering, then, just how serious is my condition because this prescription is marked β€˜NO REFILLS’.”

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The misuse of users’ Facebook data has caused Mark Zuckerberg significant emotional distress.

He asks that you respect his privacy during this challenging time.

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Which ankle did Spider-Man twist after tripping on the curb?

Ankle Ben.

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Covid-19 is just like the flu, don’t believe in all social media that are fearmongering.

Spread the word and be positive.

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