Best Jokes (4)



Yo mama’s so dumb she thought a lightsaber has fewer calories!

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Why did the blue-faced man get lost?

He was feeling blue and couldn’t find his way.

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The other day my yoga instructor turned up to the class drunk.

I was put in quite an awkward position.

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When I told my parents my wife had come down with the flu, my dad said, β€œWell, have you tried euthanasia?”

In the background, I could hear my mom yell, β€œFor the last time, Henry, it’s pronounced β€˜Echinacea!’, β€˜Echinacea!!!’.”

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I don’t always look at the heavens.

But when I do, it’s because I’m looking at Uranus.

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Because the platypus both lays eggs and produces milk?

It is one of the few animals that can make its own custard.

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My grandpa returned from the war with one leg.

We still don’t know to whom that leg belonged.

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A stormtrooper and a redshirt are in a room.

The stormtrooper shoots the redshirt, but misses every shot.

The redshirt dies anyway.

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Feel free to use me as a bad example.

That way, I won’t be totally useless.

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Why did the influencer terrorist get arrested?

Because his tick tock blew up.

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When you work from home, a Tuesday looks pretty much like a Saturday.

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Why did the mushroom have to leave her home?

It was growing toxic by the day.

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What happens if an owl doesn’t wash?

It smells fowl.

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Yo mama’s so fat when she fell I didn’t laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.

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What’s a mountain goat’s favorite name?

Cliff.

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I just found out Canada isn’t real.

Turns out it was all maple leaf.

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What is a math teacher’s favorite tree?

Geometry.

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A kangaroo mom with seven babies in her pouch told another kangaroo mom, β€œThese sleepovers are killing me.”

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Good morning!

Remember, a yawn is a silent scream for coffee.

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Why do people with vertigo hate autumn?

In case they have a bad fall.

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