Best Jokes (4)



Yo mama so poor when she found a penny she thought she had hit the lottery.

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Why did the bluebird get kicked out of the forest?

Because it was a bird of pray.

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What did the snowman say to the birthday girl?

Have an ice day!

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If anyone has no family and will be alone on Thanksgiving, please let me know.

I really need to borrow some chairs from you.

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How do you make a skeleton laugh?

Tickle their funny bones.

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How is bacon like southern Europe?

It’s got a lot of Greece in it.

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Where does a kangaroo go that can’t hop?

Hopspital.

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Arnold Schwarzenegger no longer kills people and now only kills bugs.

He’s an exterminator.

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Two attorneys went into a diner and ordered two drinks. Then they produced sandwiches from their briefcases and started to eat.

The owner became quite concerned and marched over and told them, β€œYou can’t eat your own sandwiches in here!”

The attorneys looked at each other, shrugged their shoulders, and then exchanged sandwiches.

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What do you call a cantaloupe in a swimming pool?

A watermelon.

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Do you like Mexican food? Because I want to wrap you in my arms and make you my BAE-rito.

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What would the Terminator be called in his retirement?

The Exterminator.

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Why hasn’t anyone ever seen ghost poop?

Because it’s invisible.

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What did the Rams fan do when his team won the Super Bowl?

He turned off his XBox.

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I sued the airport the other day because they didn’t want to give me my luggage.

Guess what, I lost the case.

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It’s so hot out that I walked through a car wash to remember what rain felt like.

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Once there was a bear with no ears, guess what they call it?

A β€œB”.

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There is a beaver in our local zoo who is quite the celebrity. His name is Clint.

Clint EatsWood.

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What do turkeys like to eat on Thanksgiving?

Nothing, they’re already stuffed.

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Which one of Santa’s helpers visits mermaids?

The Elf on the Shelfish.

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