In a place without geometry...
Life is pointless.
😄 😄 😄
Ohayo means “good morning” in Japanese.
And that is the most interesting thing about Ohio.
😄 😄 😄
On your 40th birthday, you might feel old.
You might be right!
😄 😄 😄
What do you call people with big ears?
Nothing, they might hear you.
😄 😄 😄
A captain notices a light in the distance, on a collision course with his ship.
He turns on his signal lamp and sends, “Change your course, 10 degrees west.”
The light signals back, “Change yours, 10 degrees east.”
The captain gets a little annoyed.
He signals, “I’m a US Navy captain. You must change your course, sir.”
The light signals back, “I’m a Seaman First Class. You must change your course, sir.”
Now the captain is mad.
He signals, “I’m an aircraft carrier. I’m not changing my course.”
The light signals back a final message, “I’m a lighthouse. Your call.”
😄 😄 😄
Patient: “Doctor, doctor! I’ve swallowed my money!”
Doctor: “Take this, and we’ll see if there’s any change in the morning.”
😄 😄 😄
I was too lazy to go out shopping today, so to make it feel like Black Friday, I punched a few family members while online shopping.
😄 😄 😄
Yo Mamas teeth are so yellow I can’t believe it’s not butter.
😄 😄 😄
Why didn’t the zombie go to school?
He felt rotten!
😄 😄 😄
I thought I saw a squirrel on the roof.
But it was just a roofing nut.
😄 😄 😄
Why do one-legged people like beer?
Because it’s made with hops.
😄 😄 😄
Why did the influenza virus break up with its girlfriend?
She was too cold to him.
😄 😄 😄
Blessed be your morning, o holy one!
😄 😄 😄
What is Spider-Man’s favorite online music app?
Spot-a-fly.
😄 😄 😄
A marvelous morning to you, my friend.
You are someone who never quits, mainly because you never start.
😄 😄 😄
Why don’t pumpkins get into arguments?
Because they have no stomach for fighting.
😄 😄 😄
The Leaning Tower of Pisa is in Italy.
So it’s italicized!
😄 😄 😄
Have you heard of the golfer who opened a colonoscopy clinic?
He does 18 holes a day.
😄 😄 😄
Chuck Norris doesn’t admire the stars.
They admire him.
😄 😄 😄
What did one hip replacement say to the other?
“You crack me up!”
😄 😄 😄
