Movie Jokes
Enjoy our team's carefully selected Movie Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!
Several aristocrats are having a party on a cruise ship, when the captain comes down and interrupts.
“I have some good news and some bad news,” he says. “Which do you want to hear first?”
“Good!” everyone says in unison.
The captain says, “We won eleven Oscars!”
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Quick way to stop feeling lonely:
Watch a horror movie in the dark.
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Why is everyone obsessed with that new horror movie?
Like, I was driving today and this is the third time someone has rolled down their window and yelled to me “Hey! Watch It!”.
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A Man was watching TV one day, when all of a sudden he began screaming in terror.
“Don’t go in the Church!” he cried. “It’s a trap!”
“Mom, is Dad watching a horror movie?” his son asked.
“No, dear, he’s watching our wedding video,” the mom replied.
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Two goats are eating garbage.
The first one finds a roll of film and eats it.
When he’s done, the second one asks, “How did you like the movie?”
The first one responds, “It was OK, but I liked the book better.”
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Why didn’t the butter take the part in the new movie?
Because it didn’t like the roll it was being offered.
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Why didn’t the skeleton go see the scary movie?
He didn’t have the guts.
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Did you see the movie about the hot dog?
It was an Oscar Wiener.
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What is Spider-Man’s favorite Disney movie?
Peter Pan.
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The Superman 2 movie and a documentary about the Moon Landing had accidentally been scheduled at the same time for the Lunar Background part of the movie lot.
They argued about who should get to use it first, but then they remembered...
Neil before Zod.
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Are aliens from invasion movies actually British?
Because all they do is colonize.
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Yo momma’s so hairy, when she went to the movie theater to see Star Wars, everybody screamed and said, “IT’S CHEWBACCA!”
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People often ask me how I manage to smuggle chocolate into movie theaters.
Let’s just say, I have a few Twix up my sleeve...
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Guess who Dracula brings with him to movie premieres?
His ghoul-friend!
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Three pregnant women are chatting in a cafe.
Heather says, “I got my ultrasound done yesterday. I’m pregnant with triplets!”
“I got mine done yesterday too,” says Linda. “I’m pregnant with septuplets!”
“I think I’ll get my ultrasound done next week,” says Martha.
The three women chat some more.
Finally, Heather says, “I got Disney+ last month. The first movie I watched on it was ‘The Three Little Pigs’.”
“I got Disney+ last month too,” says Linda. “The first movie I watched on it was ‘Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs’.” When Martha hears this, she instantly goes pale.
“It’s okay if you don’t have Disney+,” says Heather.
“I do have it,” says Martha. “It’s just that the first movie I watched on it was ‘101 Dalmatians’.”
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Yo Mama's appetite is so huge, she uses a truck to carry her popcorn to the movies.
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