At the marketplace, a seller advertises “1 lettuce for $3, 3 lettuces for $10”.
A customer passing by stops and speaks with the seller.
Customer: “That’s not right!”
Seller: “What do you mean?”
Customer: “Well, that’s not an offer—3 lettuces cost $9.”
Seller: “No, sir, it says here that 3 lettuces cost $10.”
Customer: “I know, but if I buy 1 lettuce, how much do I pay?”
Seller: “$3.”
Customer: “And if I buy 2?”
Seller: “$6.”
Customer: “Yes, because 3+3=6, now what about 3+3+3?”
Seller: “That makes 9.”
Customer: “So, 3 lettuces cost $9.”
Seller: “No sir, they cost $10, it’s written just over there, on that board.”
The client can’t fathom such a stubbornness in another human being and proceeds to prove his point to the seller.
Customer: “Here, let me buy a lettuce.”
Seller: “That will be $3, sir.”
Customer: “Now, I’d like one more lettuce.”
Seller: “That will be $3 again, sir.”
Customer: “Finally, let me buy one last lettuce.”
Seller: “That will also be $3, sir.”
Customer: “How much did I pay you those 3 lettuces?”
Seller: “$3+$3+$3, your paid $9.”
Customer: “See? 3 lettuces are worth $9, not $10, you won’t sell many lettuces if you do it this way.”
Seller: “Yes sir, I almost sold all my stock to people like you wanting to prove they’re smarter than me by buying 3 lettuces they don’t need, just to make sure they are superior. My technique works! Besides, I can overprice those lettuces to $3 and no one bats an eye!”
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Crocodiles can grow up to 20 feet.
But most have just four.
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What does a panda ghost eat?
Bam-BOO!
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Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?
You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
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The new Joker went to see a doctor for his mental health, but didn’t make an appointment.
It was a Joaquin.
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John thought he could never catch an illness.
When his co-worker asked him if he ever gets sick, he would always say “The day I become ill will be the day pigs fly”.
A few months later, it finally happened.
The swine flu.
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What do you call a goat with a beard?
A goatee.
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September is Alzheimer’s awareness month.
Did anyone else forget?
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Roses are red, violets are blue.
You look like a donkey, and smell like one too.
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A local pizza chain just folded.
The new restaurants serve only calzones now.
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She nailed the surgery.
But she’s still having a few screws loose.
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Why did the picture go to jail?
Because it was framed.
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Only you can prevent narcissism.
And if anyone tells you otherwise, they’re just jealous!
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What is the most common question the Finnish detective asks a suspect?
“What were you doing the night between November and May?”
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Yo Mama so fat when she was approaching the McDonald’s they closed due to an earthquake.
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WWhat music does SpongeBob listen to while jellyfishing?
Something catchy.
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Why did the Pilgrim kill the turkey?
Because he was in a fowl mood.
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What was the name of the frog’s favorite crisp dish?
Croaky bacon.
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Some wise guys show a civil engineer an 8 ounce glass with 4 ounces of water in it.
They ask him the age old question, “Is the glass half empty or half full?”
The civil engineer responds, “The glass is twice as big as it needs to be.”
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Chuck Norris can blow up things, without a bomb.
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