I recently heard about a study that said that all the so-called “brain foods” don’t actually help your brain at all. It’s all just pseudoscience.
Food for thought.
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Why couldn’t the joker enter the shop?
Because there was a board outside stating “No funny business”.
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The thing people overlook most of the time is their noses.
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Your mama so old when she was young, rainbows were black and white!
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Why didn’t the zombie go to school?
He felt rotten!
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I met this dude once who was really into mushrooms.
He was a real fun-gi.
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My libertarian neighbor posted a newspaper ad selling his collection of Star Trek ships.
And here I thought he believed in free Enterprise.
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How is it possible to have a civil war?
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Two friends talking:
“Hey, can I borrow some money? I’m broke.”
“Get money from your job.”
“I got fired.”
“Why?”
“My boss told me to leave all my problems behind the door, so I told him to stand outside.”
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How does white chocolate turn into dark chocolate?
Turn off the lights.
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Why did the electrician stay home on Labor Day?
He needed to recharge his batteries.
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Why does the mushroom always get invited to birthday parties?
He’s a fun-gi.
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Yo mama so vegan and fat she ate a meal and got arrested for deforestation.
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My wife is like a delicious strawberry popsicle.
Cold on the inside and 90% artificial.
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I heard that a blue jay and a cardinal fell in love.
But their relationship was a little blue-blooded.
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Teachers deserve a lot of credit.
Of course, if we paid them more, they wouldn’t need it.
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A man and his family walk into a bar.
Inside the bar, the man’s youngest child sees a Native American sitting under a sign stating “World’s longest memory”.
The child walks up to sign and decides to test if this sign is true.
The child asks, “What did you have for breakfast 30 years ago?”
The Native American states, “Eggs.”
The child states that the native could have just made that up, and then later leaves the bar.
Years later, when the child returns with his own family, he sees the same Native American at the bar.
Walking up to the man, he states a stereotypical, “How!”
The Native American replies, “Scrambled.”
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I have 4 noses, 10 eyes, 20 legs, and 6 fingers, What am I?
Ugly.
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Why did the computer go to a cyber café?
Because it needed a byte to eat.
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Where does a beard stylist buy their grooming products?
At a Shaven Eleven.
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