Your mama so dumb she bought a solar-powered flashlight.
😄 😄 😄
A Native American hitchhiker was picked up by a slick city man who was driving past the reservation.
As they were driving along, the Native American noticed a brown paper bag on the dashboard and inquired as to its contents.
The city man replied, “It’s a bottle of wine, I got it for my wife.”
The Native American looked forward at the road, nodded his head solemnly, and said, “Good trade.”
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What do you do when no one laughs at your science jokes?
Keep trying until you get a reaction.
😄 😄 😄
A web developer walks into a restaurant.
He immediately leaves in disgust as the restaurant was laid out in tables.
😄 😄 😄
Why was the math book sad on National Pi Day?
Because it had too many problems.
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The computer programmer to his son: “Here, I brought you a new basketball.”
Son: “Thank you, daddy, but where is the user’s guide?”
😄 😄 😄
Buzz Aldrin is a man who demands respect.
I saw him speak a while ago and he said, “I’m the second guy to walk on the moon...”
“Neil before me.”
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What always comes at the end of Thanksgiving?
The letter G.
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Do you know that in a couple of weeks, all gas stations are going to cut prices in half for a whole day?
April Fuels!
😄 😄 😄
How do you make Uranus laugh?
Just give it some gas!
😄 😄 😄
Uranus has a real flair for fashion.
It always rocks the planet look!
😄 😄 😄
Started working from home recently building boats in my attic...
Sails are through the roof.
😄 😄 😄
What is the opposite of mango?
Womanstay.
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Science is amazing. Some European scientists made a breakthrough and invented an Anti-Thieves Machine. It detects and catches thieves in the streets of various cities around the world with an accuracy of 99.9%!
Naturally, various countries were interested. Germany got 2 machines, France got 3, Greece got 4, Italy got 5, and Portugal, true to its showoff image, got 10.
After one hour, in Germany, 100 thieves were caught. In France, more than 250 thieves were caught. In Greece, more than 350 thieves were caught. In Italy, more than 500 thieves were caught. In Portugal, after 30 minutes, all the machines were stolen.
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What does it take to become a zombie?
Deadication.
😄 😄 😄
How many Dragon Ball Z characters does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one, but it will take 6 episodes.
😄 😄 😄
A fifteen-year-old Amish boy and his father were in a mall.
They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again.
The boy asked, “What is this, Father?”
The father, never having seen an elevator, responded, “Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don’t know what it is.”
While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat old lady in a wheelchair moved up to the moving walls and pressed a button.
The walls opened, and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small numbers above the walls light up sequentially.
They continued to watch until it reached the last number, and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order.
Finally, the walls opened up again and a gorgeous 24-year-old blonde stepped out.
The father, not taking his eyes off the young woman, said quietly to his son, “Son, go get your mother.”
😄 😄 😄
Yo sister so fat the only way she burns calories is when her food catches on fire.
😄 😄 😄
Why couldn’t the astronaut book a room on the moon?
Because it was full!
😄 😄 😄
Yo mama so stupid she tried to save a fish from drowning.
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