What is Yoda’s preferred seat on an aeroplane?
Next to a Windu.
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I’m a bipolar Star Trek fan.
I just went to the hospital to have my dilithium level checked.
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Why does the mushroom always get invited to birthday parties?
He’s a fun-gi.
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Your momma’s hair is so short she curls the hair with a grain of rice.
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If two avocado are “avocados”.
Then shouldn’t three avocado be “avocatres”, and four be “avoquatro”, and five be “avocinco”?
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A painter was murdered while working in his latest painting.
The police still can’t see the full picture.
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You know, you’re being a little moon-dy, I hope it’s just a phase!
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Two friends were discussing what they wanted to do with their lives.
One of them suggested data science.
“I’d much rather date a person, thank you,” said another.
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During the contribution’s session, the mushroom family never gave a lot. They were just two spore.
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How do you accurately guess what you’re having for dinner?
You cook it yourself!
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There’s this black kid that goes to school and realizes teachers treat him differently than the white kids.
So, he goes home, paints himself white and shows his dad.
His dad beats the crud out of him.
He shows his mother, “Hey Ma, look! I’m white!”
He gets beat by his mom too.
Lastly, he shows his grandmother, “Grandma, look! I’m white!”
She beats him badly with her cane and sends him to his room.
Later, his dad comes into his room and asks, “Son, did you learn anything out of this?”
And the boy replies, “Duh! I’ve only been white for an hour, and I already hate three niggers!”
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Pink is the early bird of the rainbow colors.
It’s always the first to rose and shine.
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A marvelous morning to you, my friend.
You are someone who never quits, mainly because you never start.
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There’s a new battle royale game launching on September 1st.
It’s called “Back to School!”.
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My physicist girlfriend told me that she loves me to the moon and back.
I’m worried she means displacement, not distance.
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Why can’t Tony Romo use the phone anymore?
Because he can’t find the receiver.
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Yo daddy is so dumb he got hit by a parked car.
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Ironforge, AP:
The worst accident in Warcraft aviation history occurred early this morning when a flying machine, piloted by an unidentified gnomish aviator, crashed into the graveyard near Thelsamar.
As of reporting time, over 300 bodies have been recovered from the crash site, and we are still digging.
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Why does everyone invite ice cream to the party?
It’s cool.
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What happens if a tree falls into mud?
It leafs an impression.
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