Jokes on Vegetarians



Enjoy our team's carefully selected Vegetarian Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!



Vegetarian Jokes


Pessimists are like German vegetarians.

They fear the wurst.

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Why did Dracula become a vegetarian?

Because his doctor said steaks were bad for his heart.

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To what would you change the name of a kid named Hunter if he becomes a vegetarian?

Gatherer.

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What do vegetarians say when they meet someone new?

Nice to vegetable you.

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Where do vegetarian vampires live?

Plantsylvania.

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People that don’t eat meat are called vegetarians, but what are people that don’t eat vegetables?

Constipated.

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If two vegetarians have a heated argument, can it still be called β€œbeef”?

Nah, it’s just a case of two people who have bad β€œtempehs.”

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Being a vegetarian in Germany is so difficult.

It’s the wurst.

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Apparently, Jude Law has a vegetarian son.

Coles Law.

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What car does a German vegetarian drive?

A Volks-vegan.

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If vegetarians eat vegetables... what do humanitarians eat?

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Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?

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What do you call it when one chickpea murders another?

Hummus-cide.

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Why did the tofu cross the road?

To prove he wasn’t chicken.

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I decided that becoming a vegetarian was a missed steak.

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Why did the vegetarian cross the road?

Because she was protesting for the chicken.

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What did one vegetarian say to the other vegetarian?

We have to stop meating like this.

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Did you hear about Bruce Lee’s vegetarian brother? His name was Brocco Lee.

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Did you know β€œVegetarian” is a Native American word?

It means β€œLousy Hunter”.

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Why did the vegetarian hot dog cross the road?

To prove he wasn’t chicken!

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At the party, the vegetarian girl won’t eat the mushrooms reason being, somebody told her that they were oyster mushrooms.

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