Vegan Jokes



Enjoy our team's carefully selected Vegan Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!



Vegan Jokes


What’s the hardest part about being a vegan?

It is getting up at 4.30am to milk the almonds.

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Yo mama so vegan and fat she ate a meal and got arrested for deforestation.

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Why do vegans lose their eyesight earlier than meat-eaters?

From reading all those tiny ingredient labels.

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What’s the difference between a vegan and a computer programmer?

One is disgusted by a rack of lamb and the other is disgusted by a lack of RAM.

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What car does a German vegetarian drive?

A Volks-vegan.

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What do you call it when one chickpea murders another?

Hummus-cide.

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Why did the tofu cross the road?

To prove he wasn’t chicken.

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I love vegan food!

It makes an excellent side dish to any meat.

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What’s a vegan’s favorite non-terrestrial moon in the solar system?

En-salad-us.

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Being vegan is so easy that I literally just stare at the sun and I’m satisfied.

Thanks, photosynthesis.

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