Enjoy our team's carefully selected Snow Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!
What do snowmen wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
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Edward Snowden was discovered trapped inside of one of his ski lodges this Saturday, November 19th.
“Edward Snowden Snowed in Snowden Snow Den”
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What’s a good winter tip?
Never catch snowflakes on your tongue until all the birds have flown south for the winter.
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Why did the boy only wear one snow boot?
There was only a 50% chance of snow.
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What do you call an aboriginal rolling down a hill?
Abolanche.
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Why are friends a lot like snow?
If you pee on them, they disappear.
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I was cycling to work when a snow plow suddenly overtook me at high speed, spreading salt which hit my face.
“BASTARD!” I shouted, through gritted teeth.
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How do snowmen get around?
They ride an icicle.
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What happens if you combine a vampire and a snowman?
You get frostbite.
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It’s so cold, I farted snowflakes.
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One snowman said to another, “I’d heard that carrots are very good for your eyes, but all I can see are carrots...”
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What a morning...
8:00 I made a snowman.
8:10 A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn’t make a snowwoman.
8:15 I made a snowwoman.
8:17 The nanny of the neighbors complained about the snowwoman’s voluptuous chest.
8:20 The gay couple living nearby grumbled that it could have been two snowmen instead.
8:25 The vegans at No. 12 complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.
8:28 I am being called a racist because the snow couple is white.
8:31 The Muslim gent across the road wants the snowwoman to wear a headscarf.
8:40 Someone calls the cops who show up to see what’s going on.
8:42 I am told the broomstick of the snowman needs to be removed because it could be used as a deadly weapon. Things get worse after I mutter, “Yeah, if it’s up your...”
8:52 My phone is seized and thoroughly checked while I am blindfolded and flown to the police station in a helicopter.
9:00 I’m on the news as a suspected terrorist bent on stirring up trouble at this sensitive time.
9:10 I am asked if I have any accomplices.
9:29 ISIS just claimed responsibility...
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What do you call an old snowman?
Water.
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Why was the snowman looking through a pile of carrots?
He was picking his nose.
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One snowman asks another, “How do you stay in such good shape?”
He answers, “All I do is set the hairdryer on high heat and pounds just melt away.”
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What do you call a snowman made of yellow snow?
The “inedible snowman”.
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Which is harder to make? A blonde, brunette or a red-headed snowman?
A blonde, because you have to hollow out its head.
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What happens when you drop a snowball in water?
It gets wet.
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What do you say to a stressed snowman?
Chill out!
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What’s the difference between snowmen and snowwomen?
Snowballs.
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What do you call a snowman in summer?
A puddle.
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What do snowmen do in summer?
Chillout.
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Did you hear about the snowman who got angry when the sun came out?
He had a total meltdown.
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What did the snowman say to the birthday girl?
Have an ice day!
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When is it acceptable for a nose to be in a salad?
When it’s a snowman’s nose!
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Snowmen like carrot cake because it tastes like boogers.
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