Enjoy our team's carefully selected Snail Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!
What does a snail wear to go dancing?
Escargogo boots.
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Why did the wolf take so long to cross the road?
It was pretending to be a snail.
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What do you call a snail holding a baseball bat?
A slugger.
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A snail starts a slow climb up the trunk of an apple tree.
He is watched by a sparrow who can’t help laughing and eventually says, “Don’t you know there aren’t any apples on the tree yet?”
“Yes,” said the snail, “but there will be by the time I get up there.”
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I’m currently studying snails and slugs.
It’s safe to say I’m a slow learner.
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A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch.
He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail.
The snail says, “What the hell was that all about?”
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Are slugs just snails that have gone through a divorce?
“Yep, she got the house.”
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Why do French people eat so many snails?
Because they don’t like fast food.
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I took the shell off my racing snail, thinking it would make him faster.
Unfortunately, it just seems to have made him more sluggish.
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A sloth named Herman is walking through the forest one day.
A gang of snails approaches him and beats him up.
Herman is left at the bottom of a tree with several cuts and bruises. Several hours later he gathers up enough strength to go to a local police station.
Herman walks into the Sergeant’s office.
“What happened to you? the officer asks.
“A gang of snails beat me up,” Herman replied.
“Can you describe what they looked like?”
“I don’t know,” the sloth says. “It all happened so fast.”
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