Enjoy our team's carefully selected Smoker Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!
I was going to smoke a turkey this Thanksgiving.
But they banned flavored vapes.
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What does a dyslexic Mexican smoke?
Tabasco.
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I know I know, smoking’s bad for me and all.
But my mama told me never to be a quitter.
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A husband was addicted to smoking and drinking.
One day, his wife got so angry that she told him, “If you keep on smoking, all of your intestines will fall out.”
Her husband didn’t believe her, so he kept on smoking and drinking, just like he always did.
His wife was determined to prove herself right, so one day she went out early in the morning and bought some big intestines. She stuffed them in her husband’s underwear as he slept.
A short while later, he woke up, let out a huge scream, and then fell silent for the next 30 minutes.
After another 30 minutes of silence, he comes downstairs, sweating profusely. “What happened?” asked the wife.
“You were right! My intestines did come out, but don’t worry, honey, after a lot of work, I finally managed to push them back in.”
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Smokers are great people to go camping with.
You can easily outrun them if a bear attacks.
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What did the daddy chimney say to the baby chimney?
“You are to little to smoke!”
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What should you give a pumpkin who can’t quit smoking?
A pumpkin patch.
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It’s so hot, I went outside for a smoke and the cigarette lit itself.
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I told my Dr. I only smoke once every blue moon...
The problem is my refrigerator is full of them.
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You are the only person that can smoke a cigarette in the rain with your hands tied on your back.
Your nose is like a natural canopy.
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