Roof Jokes

Enjoy our team's carefully selected Roof Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!

Roof Jokes

How did the roofing company become so successful?

They nailed it.

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I thought I saw a squirrel on the roof.

But it was just a roofingΒ nut.

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I took a roofing class in college.

But all the content went right over my head.

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My roofing business is having a great promotion right now.

If you buy one roof, the next one is on the house.

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What is it that keeps roofing teams together?


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What type of construction are dogs good at?


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What’s the hardest part of the roofing business?

The overhead.

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Your ears are so big your parents put you on the roof to see which way the wind is blowing.

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On the occasion of Teachers’ Day, the teacher was having a casual chat with his students.

Teacher: β€œNeil, what do you want to be when you grow up?”

Neil: β€œSir, I want to be just like you.”

Teacher, impressed: β€œAnd why is that?”

Neil: β€œBecause even I love doing nothing.”

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What do you call a mermaid on a roof?


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Santa had a leakage in the roof over his dining room.

Plumber asked:Β β€œSir, when did u notice it ?”

Santa:Β β€œLast night when it took me 3 hours to finish my soup.”

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There were these two blonds and they locked their keys in their car.

The one blonde says to the other, β€œWhat do we do? Do we get a coat hanger and pick the lock?”

The other one replied, β€œNo, people will think we’re trying to break in.”

The other one said, β€œWell, do we get a knife and cut the rubber and pop the lock?”

The other one answered, β€œNo, people will think we’re too stupid to use the coat hanger.”

The other one said, β€œWell, we better think of something quick because it’s starting to rain and the sunroof is open.”

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How do pumpkins get up to the roof?

They use a jack-o-ladder.

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Started working from home recently building boats in my attic...

Sails are through the roof.

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Elon’s opening speech for the Tesla Solar Roof really got my attention...

Who knew there were thousands of hot shingles in my area?!

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Do you have solar panels on your home yet? I just had some put on. But I’m not sure if I’ll keep them.

The other day I was in my house and the computer and lights are flickering. So I did, what you would do, I went outside to check my new solar cells.

I get outside and look up at the roof, and there is a Gorilla messing with my solar panels.

I grabbed my phone and searched for what to do.

What luck! An ad for β€œGorilla removal”.

I called the number and they said they were in the neighborhood and would be there in 5 minutes.

5 minutes later a white van showed up and as I approached the van this guy came around and opened the back van door. He pulled out a ladder, boxing gloves, a shotgun, and out jumped a little dog.

At this point, I asked the guy, β€œHey what’s the plan?”

He said, β€œWell, I’m going to put the ladder against the house, climb up on the roof, put on the boxing gloves, and box the gorilla off the roof. The little dog will bite him in the nuts and you’ll never see that Gorilla again.”

To which I asked, β€œWhat’s the shotgun for?”

β€œWell, if by chance the Gorilla knocks me off the roof, shoot the dog.”

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How do construction workers party?

They raise the roof.

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What do you call a lady who is hanging from a roof?


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