Jokes About Pirates



Enjoy our team's carefully selected Pirate Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!



Pirate Jokes


I am pretty sure that my algebra teacher is secretly a pirate.

He constantly is trying to find X.

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Why did the pirate cross the road?

To get to the second-hand shop.

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What has 8 legs, 8 arms, and 8 eyes?

8 pirates.

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A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and talk turns to their adventures on the sea.

The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg leg, a hook, and an eye patch.

The seaman asks, โ€œSo, how did you end up with the pegleg?โ€

The pirate replies, โ€œWe were in a storm at sea, and I was swept overboard into a school of sharks. Just as my men were pulling me out, a shark bit my leg off.โ€

โ€œWow!โ€ said the seaman.

โ€œWhat about your hook?โ€

โ€œWell,โ€ replied the pirate, โ€œwe were boarding an enemy ship and were battling the other sailors with swords. One of the enemies cut my hand off.โ€

โ€œIncredible!โ€ remarked the seaman.

โ€œHow did you get the eye patch?โ€

โ€œA seagull dropping fell into my eye,โ€ replied the pirate.

โ€œYou lost your eye to a seagull dropping?โ€ the sailor asked incredulously.

โ€œWell,โ€ said the pirate, โ€œit was my first day with my hook...โ€

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What do you call a pirate with both eyes and all his limbs?

A rookie.

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Where can you find a pirate who has lost his wooden legs?

Right where ye left him!

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