Enjoy our team's carefully selected Penguin Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!
Why canโt penguins fly?
Theyโre not tall enough to be pilots.
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I said to my doctor, โI wake up thinking Iโm a penguin, and by the end of the day I believe Iโm an arctic fox.โ
He told me I was bipolar.
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Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they donโt have pockets.
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Why are fat penguins so popular at parties?
They know how to break the ice.
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An Elephant, a Giraffe and a Penguin walk in to a bar.
Itโs at this point I realize that there is something wrong with my pint.
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What do you call a penguin in the Sahara desert?
Lost.
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A pair of cows were talking in the field.
One says, โHave you heard about the mad cow disease thatโs going around?โ
โYeah,โ the other cow says. โMakes me glad Iโm a penguin.โ
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Why shouldnโt you write a book on penguins?
Because writing on paper is much easier.
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A man runs into a bar and shouts, โQuick! How tall is a penguin?!โ
The bartender says, โDepends. Less than 3 feet.โ
The man cries out, โOh my God! I just drove over a nun!โ
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A man is caught with the car full of penguins.
The policeman says, โYou have to take these animals to the zoo, or else Iโll fine you!โ
The man agrees and leaves.
The next day, the same policeman again picks up the man with a car full of penguins.
The cop says, โDidnโt I tell you to take the penguins to the zoo?!โ
The man replies, โI tookย them, now Iโm going to take them to a football game.โ
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