Party Jokes



Enjoy our team's carefully selected Party Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!



Party Jokes


I didn’t wear my glasses to the party because I wanted to make a spectacle of myself.

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Knock! Knock!

β€œWho’s there?”

β€œIce Cream Soda.”

β€œIce Cream Soda, who?”

β€œIce Cream Soda whole party can hear me.”

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Knock! Knock!

β€œWho’s there?”

β€œGopher.”

β€œGopher, who?”

β€œGopher the balloons, it’s party time!”

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Knock! Knock!

β€œWho’s there?”

β€œIce cream.”

β€œIce cream, who?”

β€œIce cream if you don’t throw a great birthday party!”

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I went to an English camping party with some vegetables.

We stayed in a tea-pea.

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In Darwin, Australia, a multi-millionaire wanted to throw a party and invited all of his friends and neighbors. He also invited Brian, the sole aboriginal in the area.

He threw the party in his mansion’s garden, around the pool. Everyone was having a terrific time drinking, dancing, eating grilled prawns and oysters, and flirting.

The millionaire then announced, β€œI have a 15-foot man-eating crocodile in my pool, and I’ll give a million dollars to anyone who joins him in the pool.”

The words had only left his mouth when there was a huge splash.

Everyone turned around to see Brian fighting the crocodile in the water, jabbing it in the eyes with his thumbs, throwing punches, headbutting it, choking it, biting its tail, and tossing it into the air like some kind of martial arts expert.

The water was swirling and splashing all over the place. Brian and the crocodile were both shouting and yelling.

Brian finally strangled the crocodile and let it float to the top of the pool like a dead goldfish after what seemed like an eternity.

Brian stepped out of the pool, weary, with everyone looking at him in surprise.

β€œWell, Brian, I think I owe you a million dollars then,” the millionaire responded.

β€œNo way, boss, I don’t want it,” Brian replied.

So the millionaire says, β€œMan, I have to offer you something. You won the wager. How about a million dollars?”

β€œNo, thanks, I don’t want it,” Brian said emphatically.

The millionaire again says, β€œCome on, I have to give you something. That was incredible. What about a brand-new Porsche, a Rolex, and some stock options?”

Again, Brian said, β€œNo.”

β€œWell, Brian, then what do you want?” the rich man inquired, perplexed.

β€œI want the bastard who pushed me in,” said Brian.

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I went to a party in blue shoes.

But everyone said it was a blue-sy idea.

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I went to a party once where everyone was dressed in blue.

It was like a sea of navy-tees.

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The party was a blue-ribbon event.

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Why was Uranus sad at the solar system party?

It felt left out of the loop.

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Ever heard of the planet party?

Uranus was the star, always the center of attraction.

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When Uranus threw a party, everyone was over the moon!

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Why is Uranus always invited to parties?

It knows how to break the ice.

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Why did the alien invite Uranus to the party?

It knew Uranus would bring the atmosphere.

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What’s Uranus’ favorite party trick?

Its gas giant dance moves.

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Why did the 30-year-old throw a party with only one candle on the cake?

They didn’t want to set off the fire alarm with all those candles!

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So all the animals gathered and having a party. Everybody is drinking and talking and having a good time.

Suddenly, a chameleon get to the middle of the room, β€œCheck this out,” and start changing color of his skin for a minute straight.

Once he done he say, β€œLets see any of you do the same.”

Suddenly, octopus appear from the crowd and says, β€œHold my beer, hold my beer, hold my beer, hold my beer, hold my beer, hold my beer, hold my beer, hold my beer.”

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer.

β€œAh, October! Almost time for Halloween. This season reminds me of how I met my wife. I went to a costume party and saw her across the room. Standing there all thin and tall and gorgeous next to her fat friend. They’d come to the party together dressed as the number ten,” he tells the bartender. β€œThat’s when I knew, she was the one.”

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A popular motivational speaker was entertaining his audience.

He said: β€œThe best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who wasn’t my wife!”

The audience was in silence and shock.

The speaker added: β€œAnd that woman was my mother!”

Laughter and applause.

A week later, a top manager trained by the motivational speaker tried to crack this very effective joke at home during a small party.

He was a bit foggy after having a drink or two.

He said loudly, β€œThe greatest years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who was not my wife!”

The wife went red with shock and rage.

Standing there for 20 seconds trying to recall the second half of the joke, with the guests not saying a word, the manager finally blurted out, β€œAnd I can’t remember who she was!”

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A professor explained about marketing to MBA students:

You see a gorgeous girl at a party, you go to her and say β€œI am rich, marry me”. That’s direct marketing.

You attend a party and your friend goes to the girl to tell her β€œhe’s rich, marry him”. That’s advertising.

The same girl at the party walks to you and says β€œyou’re rich, do you want to marry me?”. That’s brand recognition.

You say β€œI’m rich, marry me” and she introduces you to her husband. That’s the demand and supply gap.

Before you say β€œI’m rich, marry me”, your wife arrives. That’s restriction from entering a new market.

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What do nuclear plants serve their workers for the Labor Day party?

Fission Chips.

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A group chat in messenger.

Frank: β€œThe party starts at 7 pm! We’ll have a BBQ so I was wondering if anyone was vegetarian?”

Karen: β€œI am! That’s so sweet of you to ask.”

Frank removed Karen from the chat.

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I had an interview for a party supplies store where I had to inflate a balloon as a test.

I blew it.

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Where did the vampire teacher throw the Teachers’ Day party?

In Pencilvania.

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Minnie came out of her room after changing for a dinner party. Goofy was there.

Minnie asked, β€œGoofy, how do I look?”

Goofy replied, β€œLike everyone else, with your eyes!”

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On the day my friends were hosting my birthday celebration, I had diarrhea.

I was a party pooper.

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A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline.

His Personal Psychic Advisor tells him, β€œYou are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you.”

The frog is thrilled, β€œThis is great! Will I meet her at a party?”

β€œNo,” says his advisor, β€œin her biology class.”

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Getting old certainly has its benefits.

Every birthday party is a surprise birthday party when you reach 80 years of age.

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Several aristocrats are having a party on a cruise ship, when the captain comes down and interrupts.

β€œI have some good news and some bad news,” he says. β€œWhich do you want to hear first?”

β€œGood!” everyone says in unison.

The captain says, β€œWe won eleven Oscars!”

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What did the internal auditor do to liven up the office party?

He didn’t show up.

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A detective walks into a party and asks the party goers, β€œDo you guys have any nacho cheese?”

The party goers respond, β€œNo dip, Sherlock.”

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I asked what I should bring to the party. The hosts said, β€œNothing, just bring a happy face.”

I had to cancel.

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Why couldn’t the skeleton go to the Christmas party?

He had nobody to go with.

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I hosted an amazing party. We had tons of cheese, but ran out of crackers.

It was cracka-lackin

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An elephant and an ape go to a party together. They want to bring some snacks: crackers and dips.

Which of them buys the crackers?

The elephant. Because the ape always buys the dip.

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Two monsters went to a party.

Suddenly one said to the other, β€œA lady just rolled her eyes at me. What should I do?”

β€œBe a gentleman and roll them back to her.”

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Two men were walking home after a Halloween party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs.

Right in the middle of the cemetery, they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows.

Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.

β€œHoly cow, Mister,” one of them said after catching his breath, β€œYou scared us half to deathβ€”we thought you were a ghost! What are you doing working here so late at night?”

β€œThose fools!” the old man grumbled. β€œThey misspelled my name!”

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Yo mama has so much hair on her upper lip it looks like Ewoks having a party when she talks.

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An English couple decided to adopt a little German boy.

After two years, the child doesn’t speak and his parents start to worry about him.

After three years, he still has not spoken and after four years, he has yet to utter a word.

The English couple figure he is never going to speak but he is still a lovely child, and on his next birthday, they throw him a party and make him a chocolate cake with orange icing.

The parents are in the kitchen when the boy comes in and says, β€œMother, Father, I do not care for the orange icing on the chocolate cake.”

β€œMy God,” says his mother. β€œYou can speak?”

To which the German boy replies, β€œOf course.”

β€œHow come you’ve never spoken before?” asks his father.

β€œWell,” says the boy, β€œup until now, everything has been satisfactory.”

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Went to a party on the moon once.

Didn’t really like it, no atmosphere.

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How do you organize a party for the moon?

You just planet!

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I went to my first full moon party at the weekend, I have to say, it eclipsed my expectations!

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There was a candy party, guess who was late as usual?

Choco-late.

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Does anybody go to the donut party?

I heard it was jam packed.

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Turning off your Zoom camera is like getting food from a buffet at a party.

You want to do it, but you don’t want to be the first, and you definitely don’t want to be the only one.

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Why does everyone invite ice cream to the party?

It’s cool.

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At a party, a young wife admonished her husband, β€œThat’s the fourth time you’ve gone back for ice cream and cake. Doesn’t it embarrass you?”

β€œWhy should it?” answered her spouse. β€œI keep telling them it’s for you.”

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I lost my watch at a party once.

An hour later I saw some guy stepping on it while he was harassing some woman at that party.

Infuriated, I immediately went over, punched him and broke his nose.

β€œNo one does that to a woman, not on my watch!”

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At the party, the vegetarian girl won’t eat the mushrooms reason being, somebody told her that they were oyster mushrooms.

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Why did the fungi leave the party?

There wasn’t mush-room for dancing.

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What’s the difference between stormtroopers having a party and mushrooms being picked?

One’s bad guys having a fun time and the other one’s fungi having a bad time!

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My friend had mushrooms during the party.

Now he’s a fun-gi.

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How do construction workers party?

They raise the roof.

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The boss always insisted that only Abdul should serve his coffee, but yesterday, this conversation happened.

Boss: β€œAbdul, since the last 8 years you have brought me coffee filled to the brim without spilling even a drop. How do you manage that over these stairs?”

Abdul: β€œSir, just before I climb up the stairs, I take a big sip. As I get upstairs, I put it back.”

Today is Abdul’s farewell party.

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Batman goes to a party. To his surprise, he sees that the Joker is there too.

β€œHe must be up to something,” he thinks. And so he sneaks up behind him, knocks him out, and puts him in a back room.

When walks out, he sees the Joker again.

β€œHow did he recover so quickly?” Once again he knocks him out and puts him in the back room.

Coming out a third time, he sees the Joker yet again.

β€œHow can this be?!” Now furious, Batman confronts him, grabs him by his vest, and shouts, β€œWhat are you doing here, Joker?!”

And he replies, β€œI’m enjoying this Halloween party, dude!”

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Albert’s retirement party presentation.

β€œToday we would like to thank Albert for his service to our company.

Albert is someone who does not know the meaning of impossible task, who does not know the meaning of lunch break, who does not understand the meaning of the word no.

So we have clubbed together and bought Albert a dictionary.”

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A doctor was chatting at a party with a chartered accountant.

He asked, β€œHow do I manage this delicate issue when people even at a party like this ask me about their joint pains and heartburn and gas trouble? Just because I am a doctor. Not fair!”

The CA friend replied coolly, β€œJust tell them the right things politely, but send them a bill from your clinic the next morning. Only once. Word will soon get around and it will stop immediately.”

β€œWow! Thanks for the tip,” said the doctor.

The next morning the doctor got a bill from his CA friend: β€œConsulting charges for Business Development”.

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Mary-Jo was going to the Christmas office party but needed a new dress.

So she went out shopping and in the clothing store she asked the assistant, β€œMay I try on that dress in the window, please?”

β€œCertainly not, madam”, responded the salesgirl, β€œYou’ll have to use the fitting room like everyone else.”

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