Motorcycle Jokes



Enjoy our team's carefully selected Motorcycle Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!



Motorcycle Jokes


I looked out of my living room window yesterday in horror to see a crowd gathered round a crashed motorcyclist.

So I quickly put on my coat and shoes and rushed outside.

Pushed through the crowds shouting β€œlet me through, let me through!”.

I finally managed to get to the front of the crowd.

A woman turned to me and said, β€œOh, thank goodness, are you a doctor?”.

I replied no, but that’s my pizza!

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Yesterday I got stuck behind a young girl riding a horse. No matter what I did, I just couldn’t get past her. I was tooting my horn, and hanging out the window yelling at her. She still wouldn’t let me past.

There was a guy on a motorcycle behind me and he was waving too.

I was getting so wound up and frustrated. β€œIt’s people like you that cause accidents!” I shouted.

Eventually, I just couldn’t take any more so I looked around to make sure the coast was clear... and then I jumped off the carousel.

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I love my motorcycle, it’s great for getting to the front of queues quicker.

It does always terrify the other people in the post office though.

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Chuck Norris can switch his motorcycle to four-wheel drive.

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Chuck Norris’s motorcycle has 4WD.

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Why are two blonde girls fighting on a motorcycle?

They are fighting because they both want to sit next to the window.

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A woman hurried to a pharmacy to pick up the medication.

When she got back to the car, she found her keys locked inside.

The woman found an old rusty coat hanger on the ground.

She looked at it and said, β€œI don’t know how to use this.”

She bowed her head and asked God to send her some help.

Within five minutes an old motorcycle pulled up, driven by a bearded man who was wearing an old biker skull rag. He got off his cycle and asked if he could help.

She said, β€œYes, my husband is sick. I forgot my keys in the car. Can you use this hanger to unlock my car?”

He said, β€œSure.”

He walked over to the car, and in less than a minute the car was open.

She hugged the man and through tears said, β€œThank you, God, for sending me such a very nice man.”

The man heard her little prayer and replied, β€œLady, I am not a nice man. I just got out of prison yesterday; I was in prison for car theft.”

The woman hugged the man again, sobbing, β€œOh, thank you, God! You even sent me a professional!”

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I was in a bar some days ago when a beautiful girl asked me, β€œWhat do you do?”

I replied, β€œI race motorcycles.”

She asked further, β€œDo you usually win many races?”

I said, β€œNo, the bikes are much faster than I am.”‬

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