Milk Jokes



Enjoy our team's carefully selected Milk Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!



Milk Jokes


I was driving down the road today when I say a sign for fresh Amish cheese that read, β€œMade with real Amish milk.”

I didn’t even know you could milk the Amish.

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


I was having random bouts of diarrhea but I couldn’t figure out what was causing it.

Then I started keeping track.

I realized it was only happening when I would wear those polo shirts with the little alligator stitched on them.

Turns out I’m Lacoste intolerant.

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


What did the customer say to the cashier who asked if he wanted his milk in a bag?

β€œJust leave it in the carton, please.”

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


A wife asks her husband to go to the shop to buy a carton of milk, and if they have eggs, to get six.

The husband returns with six cartons of milk.

When the wife asks, β€œWhy did you buy so much milk?!”

He replies, β€œThey had eggs.”

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


If I ever go missing, I would like my photo, but on wine bottles instead of milk cartons.

This way my friends will know where to look for me.

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


What do you call it when you walk into a tea shop and feel like you’ve been there before?

DΓ©ja-brew.

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


What is a deer’s favorite boba flavor?

C-antelope!

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


Was drinking a milkshake.

Me: β€œDammit, I think there’s a hole in the side of my straw.”

Dad: β€œYou think that’s bad?! Mine’s got one at the top and one at the bottom.”

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


When I was a kid I could go to the store with only $5 and come home with bread, milk, hot dogs and my favorite candy.

You can’t do that these days...

Too many damned security cameras.

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


What did the planets drink when they wanted to bulk up?

Milky Whey.

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


It’s so hot the cows are producing evaporated milk.

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


Why did the blonde buy a brown cow?

To get chocolate milk.

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


Sad news from the Nestle factory today as a man was crushed to death by hundreds of boxes of chocolate.

He tried in vain to attract attention but every time he yelled β€œThe Milky Bars are on me!”, people just cheered.

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


Which way did the cow jump over the moon?

The Milky Way!

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


Yo mama so poor she eats cereal with a fork to save milk.

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


Yo mama so old her breast milk is powder.

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


What are the sun’s favorite chocolate bars?

A Milky Way.

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


My boyfriend came over today and stole my milk.

How dairy.

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


Just went to the store and bought milk, cereal, juice and ice cream.

Cashier: β€œYou must be single, right?”

Me: β€œYes! How did you know?”

Cashier: β€œBecause you’re ugly.”

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


During a biology exam, a student has to list three pros of breast milk.

He’s unprepared, but starts looking for common sense answers and writes down:

– Contains all the nutrients a baby needs.

– Doesn’t need heating.

But he still needs one more.

And just as the time is about to run out, the student writes:

– Has great packaging.

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


If cows laughed, milk would come out of their noses.

I guess that’s why they moo.

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


What do you call a cow in an earthquake?

A milkshake!

πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„ πŸ˜„


















© 2022-2023 jokes.best