Enjoy our team's carefully selected Military Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!
What do the US military and a fart have in common?
Air Force.
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Why are they called the armed forces?
Because itβs hard to fight a war with just your legs.
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Sergeant: βI didnβt see you at camouflage training.β
Private: βThank you, sir!β
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While testing a newly installed computer, an army officer asked the machine to predict the probability of World War Three and promptly received a one-word answer βYesβ.
Annoyed at the lack of detail, the officer barked, βYes, what?β
Instantly the machine replied, βYes, sir!β
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My grandpa grew up during the depression, as a result, he never threw anything away.
He died in the war, holding a hand grenade.
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My wife was talking about funeral plans.
My Wife: βI said weβll give you a military send off like the sailors on a ship.β
Me: βI was in the Air Force.β
My Wife: βOK, weβll toss you out of an airplane.β
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Yo mama is so old she trained Yadaβs master in the force!
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The military was standing outside my house, guess what I did?
I-ran.
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A soldier ran up to a nun.
Out of breath, he asked, βPlease, may I hide under your skirt? Iβll explain later.β
The nun agreed.
A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked, βSister, have you seen a soldier?β
The nun replied, βHe went that way.β
After the MPs ran off, the soldier crawled out from under her skirt and said, βI canβt thank you enough, sister. You see, I donβt want to go to Iraq.β
The nun said, βI understand completely.β
The soldier added, βI hope Iβm not rude, but you have a great pair of legs!β
The nun replied, βIf you had looked a little higher, you would have seen a great pair of balls... I donβt want to go to Iraq either.
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