Kissing Jokes

Enjoy our team's carefully selected Kissing Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!

Kissing Jokes

Sloths never kiss on the first date, they take it slow.

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What sound do porcupines make when they kiss?


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Whatโ€™s it like to be kissed by a vampire?

Itโ€™s a pain in the neck.

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A female civil engineer is doing a field survey and finds a talking frog.

โ€œKiss me and Iโ€™ll turn into a prince and marry you,โ€ it says.

The engineer excitedly picks up the frog and continues with her job. And she doesnโ€™t kiss it.

Finally the frog asks, โ€œArenโ€™t you going to kiss me?โ€

She says, โ€œWhat? No. I donโ€™t have time to be with a prince. But a talking frogโ€”thatโ€™s a keeper!โ€

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I just got punched by my friend for trying to kiss his new baby on the forehead.

Apparently, I have to wait for the baby to be born first.

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If you get kissed by an alpaca, itโ€™s not the end of the world.

Itโ€™s the alpaca-lips.

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Youโ€™re so short you would need a lift to kiss your bride.

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Girl: โ€œWhat if a boy hugs me?โ€

Mom: โ€œSay โ€˜donโ€™tโ€™.โ€

Girl: โ€œWhat if he kisses me?โ€

Mom: โ€œSay โ€˜stopโ€™.โ€

The next day when the girl goes to school her boyfriend hugs and kisses her well so she says as her mother told her to do and she quickly said DONโ€™T STOP!

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Girlfriend: โ€œOur new neighbor always kisses his girlfriend when he leaves for work. Why donโ€™t you do that?โ€

Boyfriend: โ€œHow can I? I donโ€™t even know her.โ€

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I was in a taxi the other day and the driver said, โ€œDo you mind if I put some music on?โ€

I said, โ€œNot at all.โ€

He said, โ€œโ€˜Kiss?โ€™โ€

I said, โ€œLetโ€™s listen to the music first and see how we feelโ€

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