Juan Jokes

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Juan Jokes

Why doesn’t Mexico have an Olympic team?

Because every Juan that can jump, run and swim is already in the U.S.

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Juan comes up to the Mexican border on his bicycle. He’s got two large bags over his shoulders.

The guard stops him and says, β€œWhat’s in the bags?”

β€œSand,” answered Juan.

The guard says, β€œWe’ll just see about that, get off the bike!”

The guard takes the bags and rips them apart, he empties them out and finds nothing in them but sand.

He detains Juan overnight and has the sand analyzed, only to discover that there is nothing but pure sand in the bags.

The guard releases Juan, puts the sand into new bags, hefts them onto the man’s shoulders, and lets him cross the border.

The next day, the same thing happens.

The guard asks, β€œWhat have you got?”

β€œSand,” says Juan.

The guard does his thorough examination and discovers that the bags contain nothing but sand. He gives the sand back to Juan, and Juan crosses the border on his bicycle.

This sequence of events is repeated every day for a year.

Finally, Juan doesn’t show up one day and the guard later meets him in a Cantina in Mexico.

β€œHey, Buddy,” says the guard, β€œI know you are smuggling something. It’s driving me crazy. It’s all I think about. I can’t sleep. Just between you and me, what are you smuggling?”

Juan sips his beer and says, β€œBicycles.”

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How do you start a Mexican bedtime story?

Juans upon a time.

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What’s a Mexican’s favorite martial art?

Tae K-Juan Do.

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What number do you call in a Taco emergency?

Nine Juan Juan.

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Seven days with no food makes Juan week.

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What are the chances of winning the Mexican lottery?

Juan in a million.

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb?

Just Juan.

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Did you hear about the Mexican that got shot at the golf course?

It was a hole in Juan.

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