Enjoy our team's carefully selected History Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!
The crosseyed history teacher could not control her pupils.
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The paper my student wrote on Tsar Ivan was so bad.
It was tearable.
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In history class, the teacher taught said the Magna Carta was signed in 1215 and to write an essay on it.
A student handed in his work with “The Magna Carta was signed in 1215” written 150 times.
The teacher asked the boy, “Why did you write this?”
The boy replied, “Because you always say that history repeats itself!”
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When the history teachers wanted to help out students who were failing the subject privately, they put up a poster on the school bulletin boards that said:
“Need Tudoring?”
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When the student asked the history teacher what questions would be there for the history exam, she answered “The past”.
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Where did the Pilgrims stand after landing on Plymouth Rock?
On their feet.
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What can you find in both medieval English castles and American art museums?
Norman Rock Wells.
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Why did Julius Caesar never say thank you to anyone?
He didn’t speak English.
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Why were Native Americans in America first?
They had reservations.
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Who invented King Arthur’s Round Table?
Sir Cumference.
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The archaeologist had majored in geology in college...
But he was also a history miner.
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I met my wife while we were working at the same museum.
Our first date was in the geology section, the second in paleontology, and the rest was history.
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A student holds a gun to his English teacher, "Give me all your money or you’re geography!”
English teacher: “You mean history.”
Student: “Don’t change the subject!”
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My history textbook says that the Pharaoh of Egypt used slaves to build the pyramids.
Which is kind of weird considering he could’ve just used bricks or something.
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While admiring some dinosaur bones in the Museum of Natural History, a tourist asks the guard, “How old are they?”
The guard replies, “They are 73 million, four years, and six months old.”
“That’s a rather exact number,” says the tourist. “How do you know their age so precisely?”
“Well,” answers the guard, “The dinosaur bones were seventy-three million years old when I started working here, and that was four and a half years ago.”
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Your hairline so far back, I learned about it in history class.
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