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Jokes on Hair



Enjoy our team's carefully selected Hair Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!



Marley stopped at the town barbershop for a haircut.

After thirty-five minutes of snipping and cutting, the barber held a mirror behind Marleyโ€™s head.

โ€œHow you like it?โ€ asked the barber.

โ€œReal fine,โ€ said the redneck. โ€œBut how about making it a little longer in the back?โ€

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


The best part about working in an office is that if you ever forget that you got a haircut, someone will definitely point it out to you.

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


You are like dandruff because I just cannot get you out of my head no matter how hard I try.

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


A young boy had just gotten his driving permit.

He asked his father, who was a minister, if they could discuss his use of the car.

His father said to him, โ€œIโ€™ll make a deal with you. You bring your grades up, study your Bible a little, and get your hair cut, then we will talk about it.โ€

A month later the boy came back and again asked his father if they could discuss his use of the car.

His father said, โ€œSon, Iโ€™m real proud of you. You have brought your grades up, youโ€™ve studied your Bible diligently, but you didnโ€™t get hair cut!โ€

The young man waited a moment and replied, โ€œYou know Dad, Iโ€™ve been thinking about that. You know Samson had long hair, Moses had long hair, Noah had long hair, and even Jesus had long hair.โ€

His father replied, โ€œYes son, and they walked everywhere they went!โ€

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


I first realized I was going bald when it started taking longer and longer for me to wash my face.

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


Yoโ€™ mama is so ugly, her hairline is receding just to get away from her face.

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


An old cowboy walks into a barbershop for a shave and a haircut.

He tells the barber he canโ€™t get all his whiskers off because his cheeks are wrinkled from age.

The barber gets a little wooden ball from a cup on the shelf and tells the old cowboy to put it inside his cheek to spread out the skin.

When heโ€™s finished, the old cowboy tells the barber that was the cleanest shave heโ€™d had in years, but he wanted to know what would have happened if he had accidentally swallowed that little ball. The barber replied, โ€œJust bring it back in a couple of days like everyone else does.โ€

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


A balding man was getting a haircut.

The manโ€™s barber said, โ€œDo you know what they say if youโ€™re bald in the front?โ€

Man: โ€œNo.โ€

Barber: โ€œThey say youโ€™re a thinker.โ€

Man: โ€œOh?!โ€

Barber: โ€œDo you know what they say if youโ€™re bald in the back?โ€

Man: โ€œNo.โ€

Barber: โ€œThey say youโ€™re a lover.โ€

The man perked up.

Man: โ€œWhat do they say if youโ€™re bald in the front and the back?โ€

Barber: โ€œThat you only think youโ€™re a lover.โ€

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


What is one of the major advantages of being a bald person?

No matter what happens they can never be to blame for hair on the food!

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„


I saw a ghost at the hair salon. Can you guess what she was doing?

Getting a scare-cut!

๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„ ๐Ÿ˜„





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