Graduation Jokes

Enjoy our team's carefully selected Graduation Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!

Graduation Jokes

Chuck Norris graduated college in one hour.

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Dear Father,

university i$ really great. I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying very hard.

With all my $tuff, I $imply canโ€™t think of anything I need, $o if you would like, you can ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you.

Love, Your $on.

After receiving his sonโ€™s letter, the father immediately replies by sending a letter back.

Dear David,

I kNOw that astroNOmy, ecoNOmics and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy.

Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and you can never study eNOugh.

Love, Dad

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How many university graduates does it take to change a light bulb?

One, but it may take up to seven years!

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Three college graduates โ€” one in Math, one in Engineering, and one in Economics โ€” sit for a job interview.

The question theyโ€™re all asked is, โ€œWhatโ€™s 2+2?โ€

The Math graduate goes to the whiteboard, fills it with a proof, and concludes that, โ€œA solution exists.โ€

The Engineering graduate consults his addition tables, writes some calculations down, graphs his results, and says, โ€œ3. But weโ€™ll make it 5 just to be safe.โ€

The Economics graduate locks the door behind him, closes the curtains over the windows, and finally whispers, โ€œHow much do you want it to be?โ€

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The lawyerโ€™s son wanted to follow in his fatherโ€™s footsteps, so he went to law school and graduated with honors. Then he went home to join his fatherโ€™s firm.

At the end of his first day at work, he rushed into his fatherโ€™s office and said, โ€œFather, father! In one day I broke the Smith case that youโ€™ve been working on for so long!โ€

His father yelled, โ€œYou idiot! Weโ€™ve been living on the funding of that case for ten years!โ€

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In Jewish doctrine, when does a fetus become a human?

When it graduates from medical school.

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Yo Mama is so old Adam and Eve were at her graduation ceremony.

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