Glasses Jokes

Enjoy our team's carefully selected Glasses Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!

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Why do Java developers wear glasses?

Because they can’t C#.

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Why doesn’t Voldemort have glasses?

Nobody nose.

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My grandma is in her 90’s and she still doesn’t need glasses.

She just drinks straight out of the bottle.

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Why shouldn’t you wear glasses as you get older?

You won’t see wrinkles when you look in the mirror. Everything looks nice and smooth.

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How do you know carrots are good for your eyes?

Because you never see rabbits wearing glasses.

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It was so cold that the optician was giving away free ice scrapers with every new pair of eyeglasses.

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I’ll never forget this solar eclipse, it’ll forever be seared into my mind...

...and retinas. I really should’ve worn some glasses.

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I really wish someone would have told me how long this solar eclipse was going to take.

Don’t get me wrong, I had been enjoying watching it, but had I known it would still be going on for this long, I would have bought a pair of those fancy NASA glasses.

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Whenever I see a man with a beard, mustache and glasses, I think

“There’s a man who has taken every precaution to avoid people doodling on photographs of him.”

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Why did the teacher wear sunglasses in class?

Because the class was so bright!

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What does the sun drink out of?

Sun-glasses.

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