Fruit Puns and Hilarious Fruit Jokes
Enjoy our team's carefully selected Fruit Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!
Whenever I asked for something, my life gave me lemons.
That explains my acidity problems.
😄 😄 😄
If life hands you lemons, break out the tequila!
😄 😄 😄
Chuck Norris is the only one that can turn lemonade into lemons.
😄 😄 😄
A man approaches a priest.
“Bless me, Father, for I have sinned,” he says. “I’ve spent the week with seven beautiful women.”
“Do not fret, my son,” says the priest. “All you need to do is take seven lemons, squeeze the juice into a glass, and drink the juice.”
“Will that cleanse my sin from me?”
“No, but it’ll wipe that smile off your face.”
😄 😄 😄
What do you receive when you ask a lemon for help?
Lemon aid.
😄 😄 😄
What did the grape say when the Koala stood on it?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
😄 😄 😄
My grandma was famous for her delicious strawberries.
She made me promise that when she died I would plant strawberries over her grave so everyone could visit and enjoy them.
I fulfilled her wish.
She’s dead and berried.
😄 😄 😄
Two blondes were taking their first train trip to Warsaw on the train.
A vendor came down the corridor selling bananas that they’d never seen before.
Each bought one.
The first one eagerly peeled the banana and bit into it just as the train went into a tunnel.
When the train emerged from the tunnel, she looked across at her friend and said, “I wouldn’t eat that if I were you.”
“Why not?”
“I took one bite and went blind for half a minute.”
😄 😄 😄
Why don’t blondes eat bananas?
They can’t find the zipper.
😄 😄 😄
Broccoli: “Hey, I look like a tree.”
Mushroom: “Wow, I look just like an umbrella.”
Walnut: “I look exactly like a brain.”
Banana: “Man, can we change the topic please?”
😄 😄 😄
Why did two women walk into a saloon pointing bananas at people and shouting, “GIVE US YER LOOT”?
They were both blonds.
😄 😄 😄
How come “you’re a peach” is a complement, but “you’re bananas” is an insult?
Why are we allowing fruit discrimination to tear society apart?
😄 😄 😄
Chuck Norris can squeeze orange juice out of a lemon.
😄 😄 😄
Yo mama’s so stupid she stared at a cup of orange juice for 12 hours because it said “concentrate”.
😄 😄 😄