Enjoy our team's carefully selected Fruit Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!
Whenever I asked for something, my life gave me lemons.
That explains my acidity problems.
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If life hands you lemons, break out the tequila!
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Chuck Norris is the only one that can turn lemonade into lemons.
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A man approaches a priest.
βBless me, Father, for I have sinned,β he says. βIβve spent the week with seven beautiful women.β
βDo not fret, my son,β says the priest. βAll you need to do is take seven lemons, squeeze the juice into a glass, and drink the juice.β
βWill that cleanse my sin from me?β
βNo, but itβll wipe that smile off your face.β
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What do you receive when you ask a lemon for help?
Lemon aid.
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What did the grape say when the Koala stood on it?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
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My grandma was famous for her delicious strawberries.
She made me promise that when she died I would plant strawberries over her grave so everyone could visit and enjoy them.
I fulfilled her wish.
Sheβs dead and berried.
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Two blondes were taking their first train trip to Warsaw on the train.
A vendor came down the corridor selling bananas that theyβd never seen before.
Each bought one.
The first one eagerly peeled the banana and bit into it just as the train went into a tunnel.
When the train emerged from the tunnel, she looked across at her friend and said, βI wouldnβt eat that if I were you.β
βWhy not?β
βI took one bite and went blind for half a minute.β
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Why donβt blondes eat bananas?
They canβt find the zipper.
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Broccoli: βHey, I look like a tree.β
Mushroom: βWow, I look just like an umbrella.β
Walnut: βI look exactly like a brain.β
Banana: βMan, can we change the topic please?β
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Why did two women walk into a saloon pointing bananas at people and shouting, βGIVE US YER LOOTβ?
They were both blonds.
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How come βyouβre a peachβ is a complement, but βyouβre bananasβ is an insult?
Why are we allowing fruit discrimination to tear society apart?
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Chuck Norris can squeeze orange juice out of a lemon.
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Yo mamaβs so stupid she stared at a cup of orange juice for 12 hours because it said βconcentrateβ.
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