Dumb Jokes
Enjoy our team's carefully selected Dumb Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!
The skeleton didn’t mind that everyone called him a bonehead.
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Two guys in an insane asylum are up for parole.
The first guy goes to see the committee, and they ask him some questions.
Committee: “Who discovered America?”
Guy 1: “Christopher Columbus.”
Committee: “How long ago was that?”
Guy 1: “Around three hundred years.”
Committee: “Do aliens exist?”
Guy 1: “It’s possible, but there’s no proof.”
He goes back outside and says to the other insane guy, “It’s easy, you just answer “Christopher Columbus”, “Around three hundred years”, and “It’s possible, but there’s no proof”.
So the other guy goes in, and the questions begin.
Committee: “What’s your name?”
Guy 2: “Christopher Columbus.”
Committee (incredulously): “How old are you?”
Guy 2 (with conviction): “Around three hundred years.”
Committee: “Are you insane?”
Guy 2: “It’s possible, but there’s no proof.”
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Yo mama so dumb she thought Nickelback was a refund.
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Yo mama so dumb she uses Old Spice body wash to cook.
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Yo mama so dumb she thought Call of Duty was a game about pooping.
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Yo mama so dumb when she got locked in a grocery store she starved to death.
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Yo mama so dumb her IQ is lower than Jeffy the Puppet.
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A guy is standing in the street shouting out, “I am God! I am God!”
The police call a social worker who comes over to see if he can help.
Walking up to the guy he asks, “What is your name?”
“I am God,” the guy replies getting agitated.
The social worker says, “Calm down. Why don’t we go into this coffee shop, sit down and have a talk.”
As soon as they enter the shop the barista looks at the guy and exclaims, “Oh God, not you again!?”
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A young idiot is told that it looks like his beard is coming in, so he goes down to the gate to wait for it to arrive.
While he’s waiting a friend sees him and asks what he’s doing.
“I’m waiting for my beard, I was told it was coming in,” Says the idiot.
“No wonder people call you an idiot,” says the friend. “How do you know it’s not coming in from the other gate?”
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Three guys are in the woods: a really smart guy, an average and a really dumb guy.
They are bored so the smart guy decides to go hunting.
A little while later he comes back with a deer.
The average guy asks, “How did you do that?”
The really smart guy says, “I see deer tracks, I follow deer tracks, I see deer and I shoot deer.”
The average guy says, “I think I understand,” and leaves.
A little bit later he comes back with a raccoon.
He really dumb goes gasp, “How did you do that!?”
And the average looks at him funny and says, “Well I see raccoon tracks, I follow raccoon tracks, I see raccoon and I shoot raccoon.
The super dumb guy thinks for a second and says, “Oooohh ok, I think I can do that…,” and leaves.
Hours pass and the guy finally returns hurt, bloody and horribly mingled. They run to help him.
Finally one of the guys asked him what happened.
This is what he said, “I see train tracks, I follow train tracks, I see train and I shoot train, but train keeps coming.
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Teacher: “Now class, if you are dumb, please stand up.”
No one stands up.
Teacher: “Oh c’mon. I know someone over here is dumb.” Waves her finger around the left side of the room.
Little Johnny stands up.
Teacher: “Oh, Johnny, you think you’re dumb?”
Little Johnny: “No, I just feel bad you’re standing alone.”
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You so dumb you have to stop during track workouts to ask for directions.
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You so dumb you once tried to exchange a bib number because you thought the whole thing was printed upside down.
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Man: “God, why did you make woman so beautiful?”
God: “So you would love her?”
Man: “But God, why did you make her so dumb?”
God: “So she would love you?”
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Yo mama so dumb she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
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Yo mama is so dumb and hungry the only letters in the alphabet she knows are K.F.C.
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Your mama is so dumb when dad said it’s chilly outside she brought a spoon and a bowl.
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Yo momma so dumb when y’all were driving to Disneyland she saw a sign that said “Disneyland left” so she went home.
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Yo momma is so dumb she thinks Johnny Cash is a pay toilet!
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