Enjoy our team's carefully selected Duck Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!
I asked the hairdresser if she ever gave a henna rinse.
She said, βNo, but I once gave a duck a bath.β
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What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter on Thanksgiving Day?
βQuack! Quack!β
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Why do ducks fly over Alabama upside down?
Thereβs nothing worth craping on.
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What do you call two ducks who walk like, act like, and believe they are geese?
A paradux.
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A man in a movie theater notices what looks like a duck sitting next to him.
βAre you a duck?β asked the man, surprised.
Duck: βYes.β
Man: βWhat are you doing at the movies?β
The duck replied, βWell, I liked the book.β
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A woman is giving birth and her husband rushes to the hospital to be there.
On his way, he decides to call the hospital to see how sheβs doing but he accidentally calls Lords cricket ground instead.
Someone answers and the husband asks, βHi. Howβs everything going there?β
The reply came, βWell... we have three out and hope to have the rest out by lunch. Last one was a duck.β
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A group of ducks flew overhead in a V formation.
Do you know why one side of the V is longer than the other?
It has more ducks.
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What do you say when itβs raining chickens and ducks on April Foolsβ Day?
Itβs fowl spring weather.
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What does a duck thatβs made of avocado say?
Guac.
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What do you get if you cross Santa with a duck?
A Christmas Quacker!
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βGot any crackers?β asked the duck of the bartender.
The bartender replies, βNo, get out of here!β
The duck returns after a few minutes and asks, βGot any crackers?β
The bartender yells, βNo! If you ask me again, Iβm gonna nail your beak shut!β
The duck returns in a half hour, βGot anyΒ nails?β
Bartender: βNO! Get out of here!β
Duck: βGot any crackers?β
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I canβt take my dog to the park because the ducks keep trying to bite him.
I guess thatβs what I get for buying a pure-bread dog.
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