Duck Jokes



Enjoy our team's carefully selected Duck Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!



Duck Jokes


Why do ducks fly over Alabama upside down?

There’s nothing worth craping on.

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What do you call two ducks who walk like, act like, and believe they are geese?

A paradux.

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A man in a movie theater notices what looks like a duck sitting next to him.

β€œAre you a duck?” asked the man, surprised.

Duck: β€œYes.”

Man: β€œWhat are you doing at the movies?”

The duck replied, β€œWell, I liked the book.”

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A woman is giving birth and her husband rushes to the hospital to be there.

On his way, he decides to call the hospital to see how she’s doing but he accidentally calls Lords cricket ground instead.

Someone answers and the husband asks, β€œHi. How’s everything going there?”

The reply came, β€œWell... we have three out and hope to have the rest out by lunch. Last one was a duck.”

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A group of ducks flew overhead in a V formation.

Do you know why one side of the V is longer than the other?

It has more ducks.

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What do you say when it’s raining chickens and ducks on April Fools’ Day?

It’s fowl spring weather.

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What does a duck that’s made of avocado say?

Guac.

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What do you get if you cross Santa with a duck?

A Christmas Quacker!

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β€œGot any crackers?” asked the duck of the bartender.

The bartender replies, β€œNo, get out of here!”

The duck returns after a few minutes and asks, β€œGot any crackers?”

The bartender yells, β€œNo! If you ask me again, I’m gonna nail your beak shut!”

The duck returns in a half hour, β€œGot anyΒ nails?”

Bartender: β€œNO! Get out of here!”

Duck: β€œGot any crackers?”

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I can’t take my dog to the park because the ducks keep trying to bite him.

I guess that’s what I get for buying a pure-bread dog.

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