Computer Science Jokes



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Computer Science Jokes


A group of computer scientists walk into a restaurant and ask for a table for 4.

The waitress replies, β€œBut sir, there are 5 of you.”

The computer scientist says, β€œNo, look, there are 4 of us, see! 0...1...2...3...4...”

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Why do computer scientists make bad arborists?

Because they always plant their trees upside down.

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A computer scientist named Bob was about to leave to rent a movie.

As Bob was heading out, his wife said, β€œWhile you’re out, pick up some eggs.”

Bob never came back.

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What do marathoners and computer scientists have in common?

They want the fastest running time.

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There are 2 truly difficult problems in computer science:

0. Naming things.

1. Cache invalidation.

2. Off by one errors.

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Why couldn’t the computer science student read his textbook?

He couldn’t find page 404.

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Why is it that people who use the metric system of measurement are experts in computers and computer science?

Because they are all very good pro-gram-mers!

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Me: β€œI’m so sorry, my dog ate my homework.”

Rolling his eyes, my computer science professor shot back, β€œReally?! Your dog ate your coding assignment?”

Me: β€œWell, to be perfectly honest, it did take him a couple bytes.”

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A mugger jumps out in front of a university student and shouts, β€œYour money or your life!”

The student keeps walking and says, β€œSorry mate, I’m a computer science student. I don’t have either.”

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