Buddhist Jokes

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Buddhist Jokes

A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk fall out of a plane.

The Buddhist monk says, β€œIt will be okay, for we shall all be reincarnated.”

The priest says, β€œIt will be okay, for we shall all meet in Heaven.”

The rabbi says, β€œAm I the only one who remembered we were going skydiving today?”

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Why did the Buddhist coroner get fired?

He kept listing the cause of death as birth.

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A lost hiker is on one side of a raging river when he sees a Buddhist monk on the other side.

There are no bridges. He has no boat.

He shouts out to the monk on the opposite bank, β€œHow do I get to the other side?”

The Buddhist monk shouts back, β€œYou are on the other side!”

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Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused a Novocain injection during root canal treatment?

He wanted to transcend dental medication.

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A Tibetan monk sees the face of Jesus in a tub of margarine.

He immediately raises his eyes to the heavens and exclaims, β€œI can’t believe it’s not Buddha!”

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How is a dyslexic cow like a Buddhist monk?

Both say β€œommmmmmmmm.”

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A Buddhist monk, visiting New York City for the first time in twenty years, walked up to a hot dog vendor, handed him a twenty-dollar bill, and said, β€œMake me one with everything.”

The vendor pocketed the money and handed the Buddhist monk his hot dog.

The monk, after waiting for a moment, asked for his change.

The vendor looked at him and said, β€œChange comes from within.”

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