Bomb Jokes

Enjoy our team's carefully selected Bomb Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!

Bomb Jokes

A senator is visiting a primary school.

In one class, he asks the students if anyone can give him an example of a tragedy.

One little boy stands up and offers, β€œIf my best friend who lives next door is playing in the street when a car came by and killed him, that would be a tragedy.”

β€œNo,” the senator says, β€œthat would be an ACCIDENT.”

A girl raises her hand, β€œIf a school bus carrying fifty children drove off a cliff, killing everyone inside… that would be a tragedy.”

β€œI’m afraid not,” explains the senator. β€œThat is what we would call a GREAT LOSS.”

The room is silentβ€”none of the other children dare volunteer.

β€œWhat?” asks the Senator, β€œIsn’t there anyone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?”

Finally, Little Johnny in the back raises his hand.

In a timid voice, he says, β€œIf an airplane carrying a senator was blown up by a bomb, that would be a tragedy.”

β€œMarvelous!” the senator beams. β€œAnd can you tell me WHY that would be a tragedy?”

β€œWell,” says Johnny, β€œbecause it wouldn’t be an accident, and it certainly wouldn’t be any great loss.”

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Apparently, describing the beautiful city of Hiroshima as β€œThe bomb” is not okay.

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Those soldiers thought they could blow up that submarine with their bomb...

But they needed to sea mine.

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What are bombing instructors in Jihad camps getting tired of hearing?

β€œOK Boomer!”

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Terrorists in Baghdad recently blew up a drainage system.

Police there are calling it a sewer-side bombing.

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What do you call an Arab who has been injured in a bombing?

An ambulance!

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A statistician told a friend that he never took airplanes, β€œI have computed the probability that there will be a bomb on the plane,” he explained, β€œand although this probability is low, it is still too high for my comfort.”

Two weeks later, the friend met the statistician on a plane.

β€œHow come you changed your theory?” he asked.

β€œOh, I didn’t change my theory, it’s just that I subsequently computed the probability that there would simultaneously be two bombs on a plane. This probability is low enough for my comfort. So now I simply carry my own bomb.”

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If Chuck Norris is defusing a bomb and has a choice of red wire, yellow wire and green wire, he chooses blue.

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When Chuck Norris was a kid, he entered a pool bombing competition.

This place now widely known as the Niagara Falls.

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What sound do you hear when you drop a bomb on a cow?


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Chuck Norris can blow up things, without a bomb.

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What’s a terrorist’s favorite day in November?

Bomb fire night.

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What did the laser weapon say to the atom bomb?

β€œOK Boomer.”

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I got fired from the bomb squad today.

It’s too bad really…

I had a blast working there.

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An Indian chief is driving his Cadillac somewhere at Nevada. Suddenly his car gets broken.

He examines it, and reveals that a technician must be called. But the chief has only $4, and no credit card.

So he gathers some wood, makes a fire and signals his tribe with its smoke, β€œHey, send somebody to my location with $500!”

The tribe accepts this signal, but to make sure in its meaning, signals back once again with the smoke, β€œOK, chief, but why so much?”

At this moment a ground test of nuclear bomb is being held on the test field nearby. A huge mushroom-like cloud of smoke rises into the sky.

The tribe signals, β€œOK, OK, chief, we just wondered, why to be so angry?”

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How do you call a suicide bomber with Tourette’s?

A ticking time bomb.

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