Autism Jokes



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Autism Jokes


One day, a mother sends her son to the market to get some groceries.

She tells him, β€œYou need you to go to the store and get a gallon of milk. If they have avocados, get 6.”

The autistic one comes back with 6 gallons of milk and tells her, β€œThey had avocados.”

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What do you call a stick with autism?

Autistic.

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How is being autistic a bit like being a photon?

Getting from here to someplace else is instantaneous, but what happens in between is incomprehensible.

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How many autistic people does it take to change a lightbulb?

β€œOne, but what do you want me to change it into?”

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Why did the redneck get colored pencils before he got his flu shot?

He heard that vaccines can make you artistic.

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One day this kid walks into an ice cream parlor and asks the guy behind the counter, β€œDo you have onion-flavored ice cream?”

The guy says, β€œNo, we don’t have onion-flavored ice cream.”

So the kid says, β€œOk,” and leaves.

The next day, the kid comes back in and asks the same question.

The guy again informs him that they don’t carry onion-flavored ice cream.

This goes on for a week, and the guy running the ice cream shop figures the kid is probably autistic.

So, one night, he goes home and starts to work on a recipe for onion-flavored ice cream. He stays up all night working and perfecting onion-flavored ice cream, just for this kid.

Then, the next morning, when the kid comes in at his usual time and asks if they have onion-flavored ice cream, the guy answers him.

β€œYes! Yes, we have onion-flavored ice cream!”

The kid replies, β€œYou must be stupid. Who is gonna buy onion-flavored ice cream?!”

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