Enjoy our team's carefully selected Alcoholic Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!
Alcohol is a perfect solvent.
It dissolves marriages, families and careers.
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What do alcoholics and chemists have in common?
They both view alcohol as a solution.
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An alcoholic wakes up in jail on New Yearโs Eve.
He asks the first police officer he sees, โWhy am I here?โ
โFor drinking,โ replies the officer.
โGreat,โ says the man, โWhen do we start?โ
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Alcoholics donโt run in my family.
But sometimes they fall down the stairs.
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โHi, my name is Bob, and Iโm an alcoholic.โ
โSir, this is Triple A, not Alcoholics Anonymous.โ
โI know, Iโm just trying to explain why my car is in a lake.โ
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If you drink too much alcohol you are an alcoholic.
If you drink too much Fanta, does that make you Fantastic?
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Priest: Donโt drink too much liquor. You will go to Hell.โ
Alcoholic: โReally? What about the guy who sells the liquor?โ
Priest: โHe will also go to Hell.โ Alcoholic: โOk, what about the girl who sells Al Pastor tacos, and puts out in the food truck outside the Liquor Store?โ Priest: โShe too will go to Hell.โ Alcoholic: โIn that case, I have no problem going to Hell.โ
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