Enjoy our team's carefully selected A Man Walks Into a Bar Jokes. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends!
A man walked into a Florida bar with his crocodile and asked the bartender, โDo you serve lawyers here?โ
Bartender: โSure.โ
Man: โGood. One beer for me and a lawyer for my crocodile.โ
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A blind man walks into a bar...
And a wall, and a tree, and a cactus.
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A man runs into a bar and shouts, โQuick! How tall is a penguin?!โ
The bartender says, โDepends. Less than 3 feet.โ
The man cries out, โOh my God! I just drove over a nun!โ
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A man walks into a bar...
His alcoholism is destroying his family.
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A man walks into a bar with a fried egg on his head.
The bartender asks, โWhy have you got a fried egg on your head?โ
The man replies, โBecause boiled eggs fall off.โ
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A man and his family walk into a bar.
Inside the bar, the manโs youngest child sees a Native American sitting under a sign stating โWorldโs longest memoryโ.
The child walks up to sign and decides to test if this sign is true.
The child asks, โWhat did you have for breakfast 30 years ago?โ
The Native American states, โEggs.โ
The child states that the native could have just made that up, and then later leaves the bar.
Years later, when the child returns with his own family, he sees the same Native American at the bar.
Walking up to the man, he states a stereotypical, โHow!โ
The Native American replies, โScrambled.โ
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A man walks into a bar, then goes to the bathroom. He comes out, goes to the bartender.
He says, โYouโve got a great place, but my buddy was here last night, and he said you have golden urinals. Where are they?โ The bartender turns to the band and yells, โFrank, Iโve got a lead on the guy who ruined your sax!โ
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A man walks into a bar sporting the worst haircut youโve ever seen.
โGive me two shots of Jack Daniels,โ he says to the bartender. โOne for me, and one for you.โ
โYou know, I donโt drink on the job,โ the bartender says, pouring the man a shot.
Downing the drink, the man replies, โAnd thatโs why I like you better than my barber!โ
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A bearded man walks into a bar, โEverybodyโs drinks are on me tonight!โ
He then drank his beer, went to the restroom and shaved his beard.
later he went to the bartender and asked, โHow much should I pay?โ
โNo, sir, a bearded gentleman has paid for your drink tonight.โ
โOk,โ and he left.
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